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In 2011, Robert H. Sarkissian plans to publish a book of poems entitled (probably) "THE WIND COUGHED AT DAWN". He is going to ask a couple of reviewers to read the manuscript shortly, so check this space soon.
SQUIBBED!: SATIRES AND OTHER ODDITIES
by Robert H. Sarkissian
2010, 78 pages, $12.95
Squibbed! Squibbed? A squib is a short and witty or sarcastic saying or writing. Or in journalism a short news story, often used as a filler. Satirist Robert H. Sarkissian tries his best to be short and witty in various forms: fake news stories, interviews, commentaries, and novels. Yes, novels. The kind that fit on one page, and with very serious titles such as: "Eat the Veggies: A Novel About Sex, Power, and Brussels Sprouts" , "Forensic Crime Scene Special Pathology Task Force Homicide And Gruesome Accidental Suicide Unit (FCSSPTF-HGASU): Miami " , "Murder In A Small Town: A Story About A Murder In A Small Town". Or you can sing along with some of the oddest songs ever written, such as: "The 14th Century Antiwar Protest Marching Song" , "The Zingian National Anthem" , "Waiter, There s A Phenomenologist In My Soup". If you ever wondered about the research activities of ballroom-dancing existential psychologists, or wanted to read an interview with a literature professor whose colleague was abducted by aliens who like aromatherapy, or wondered what Friedrich Nietzsche wrote after he went insane, or even wanted to learn more about Hans Dolph Nilsson, the world's oldest diplomat (1526 - ), then this book is for you.
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REVIEW:
"Robert H. Sarkissian is a satirist, a journalist, a novelist, a playwright, a punster - in general, the owner of one of the funniest minds today. Hopefully with this small book, SQUIBBED!: SATIRES AND OTHER ODDITIES, his name will become a household word. He belongs in front of a camera or another equally appropriate platform for his gifts. But until that time this book of treasures will be one of the best antidotes for intellectual ennui on your bookshelf.
Sarkissian's spectrum of biting and hilarious topics range from little essays such as 'Dr. Kevorkian Learned Tap Dancing in Prison' (to the tune of 'Raindrops keep falling on my head'), or 'Al-Qaeda Presents Comedy Team As New Marketing Strategy', to examinations such as 'The Marxist Feminist Oppressed Womyn's Club Qualification Examination' (Question #1. Men are____a. Brown smelly sticky sludge b. Systematic greedmongers who purposely devise schemes to make womyn miserable c. Pigs d. Brainless scumbags who smell like sweat etc), to NEWS NON-STORIES: 'If the headline is good, why ruin it by writing a story?', 'Anorexics Walking a Thin Line', 'President Seeks to Spend More Money on Thrift Programs,' etc.
Every page of this little jewel of a book is full of very wise, keenly observed foibles that the author takes delight in parodizing. It is rare to come across a volume so packed with information shared with a tongue in cheek patter that is simply meant to entertain - and......to make us think a bit about just how absurdly we humans can act and speak. It belongs on everyone's beside table to provide a bit of humor and a chuckle at the end of an otherwise beleaguered day."
- Grady Harp (Los Angeles, CA United States)